Kale ‘Em All by Mealtallica: 3 Reasons Why You Should Fucking Eat Kale

By this point, you probably know what kale is.  No, kale is not hipster food.  Kale is a cruciferous vegetable.  Stop being a jackass and trying to pronounce that (say Crew-Siff-Er-Us, good job, you are now hooked on phonics, and probably should go into rehab for that).  Other vegetables in this family include things like broccoli, and Brussel sprouts.  Stop gagging at the thought of Brussels sprouts, they are tasty when cooked right.  If you are still lost look at this picture.


Photo from commons.wikimedia.org

Kale is a bunch of healthy leaves.  Ooh, so scary, right?  Wait, what was I writing about?  I got too busy listening to music.  Oh yeah, three reasons to eat this shit…

  1. It’s high in vitamin K. Vitamin K is known as the “blood clotting” vitamin.  As in this vitamin helps keep you from bleeding out when you are cut.  Some research also suggests that vitamin K consumption helps keep your brain and bones healthy into old age, which means that eating these little green bastards could possibly keep you head banging with your grandchildren for a little longer.
  2. Kale is also rich in beta-carotene, the pre-vitamin form of vitamin A.  Vitamin A is one of those vitamins that does, like, a million things to benefit your body.  Vitamin A helps keep your vision working, especially at night.  However, it also has been found to help your organs, such as your heart, lungs, and kidneys function right.  In addition that, vitamin A can improve immune function.  But, most importantly, vitamin A helps out with reproduction.  Because who cares if your guts are falling apart when that organ is working at full capacity?


Image from commons.wikimedia.org

  1. Because more vitamins, kale is also a good source of vitamin C.  Vitamin C, like vitamin A, is one of those people in school or the office that like to do so much to make you look bad by comparison.  Vitamin C acts as one of those “antioxidants” people talk about so much.  Basically it helps to remove byproducts of living, and whatever environmental things you are exposed to, like UV radiation from the sun, or pollution. Vitamin C is also good for making collagen, which is used to help wound healing.  Vitamin C also helps the immune system, which is why people get some weird fetish with this vitamin during winter months.  Vitamin C also helps you absorb iron from plant-based sources.

Well, now you have been partially edumacated about kale, and why the band wagon is a good one to jump on.  I suggest that if you want to start eating some, put it in a salad.  It adds nice texture and flavor to the desecrated leaf corpse pile.

So what do you guys think?  How would YOU eat kale then?

Please note that anything posted here is NOT to be taken as medical advice, it’s just some guy researching food.